are we born equal?

hey,sorry for the second blog of the day but an interesting thought just stuck me and didnt want to lose it. the engaging question was, "are we born equal?" i chose to answer in the affirmative until recently but now i have my doubts. i believed that we are all identical in personality, intelligence and talent (if not appearance) at birth and our surroundings shape our minds. science doesnt really agree with me. talents are acquired through those magical components that we now term as "genes" though their refinement may entirely depend on the individual's upbringing and education. so, in reality, we arent born equal. some of us are more good at something than others. and we may not gain expertise in something no matter how hard we try coz "we arent born that way". i know the whole discourse reeks of fatalism but give it a thought. and while i was thinking on the same lines, i stumbled upon another significant idea. here goes....if i were God, y wud i take the trouble of creating so many creatures and pay attention to so much detail in each of them. furthermore, even in each species, i make distinction between individuals. y? coz i'm bored and have nothing else to do? what can be my motive behind all this? and y do my creations have to go through the birth and death cycle? in fact, y does science put almost everything in terms of cycles? whats the point of going round and round repeating the same thing over and over, returning to the same state over and over and yet, not remaining in the same state for long? wat is the "whole point"? i'm lost. there are so many questions and no convincing answers. think about it and let me know.

devil's back!

after the looooooonnnnnnggg calm,here's the storm. well,lots of changes have been happening since the last blog and yet,nothing has really changed. confused? let me puzzle u further:) significant events after that blog b4 bro's engagement have been bro's engagement, getting a foothold in work and then, experiencing the pain of neglect, the successful completion of a year at work and earning the tag of "experienced associate"(have a gut feeling that is pretty significant but havent yet figured out the real significance of it), big b relocating to india, change of office caterers calculated to starve employees to death, getting rid of my hypocritic manager(oh! that disgusting man!) by his moving onto another project(one of the happiest moments of my life) and the conclusion of a year-and-a-half saga of uncertainities and assumptions on the marriage alliance front. yes, urs truly is back on the eligible spinster bandwagon and her search for the elusive mr.right continues:) learnt along the way through all the events at work and in the social scene that u cant always get what u wish for in life but check out what u've got, it probably wud suit u better than what u, in the first place,assumed wud. and another important lesson i'm trying to master after 22 years of refusal to believe in it is this: u cant make all the people happy all the time. the kid in me still doesnt wanna grow up and accept this but hey,world, i am making a sincere effort this time round to learn this lesson.
am slowly sinking into the stupor, monotony and melancholy of a working woman's life but i wonder how long it will last. i hope my spirit regains its spirit and fights back(what a cliched expression). i hope from my current mindset of being an also-ran(which i definitely know i'm not), i get back my spirit to become an achiever-an achiever not by anyone else's standards but by mine alone and if the world agrees with my benchmarks, thats an icing on the cake! wow, thats pretty encouraging, devil, read this repeatedly and in time, u shud b outta ur current stupid numbness of mind:) and hey, am eagerly awaiting my diwali vacation. going home after almost a year! hope it turns out well. hmm...after the exhaustive and tiresome lakshya session(the annual exercise of getting goals for the company) the whole of this sunday, i guess my blog isnt as cheerful as it cud b. anyway, happy diwali, ciao and...."i'll be back" terminator style!:))

harsh reality of life

ok,blogger pal,this blog is gonna b a serious one. so, b prepared... u know,getting into development work has had its share of ups and downs for me. the upside is that after a long,bitter struggle with my project manager, i've finally been assigned development work(though its only bug fixes and enhancements,yet its good work) and that too in c++,a language i love! cudnt have asked for anything better! the downside is that i took the handover from a guy who has had abt 4-5 yrs of cpp experience and the code he's developed is really good! takes a bit of time to grasp and now that i'm alone,sometimes it gets a bit taxing when i have some kind of a clarification or doubt and there's no one around to turn to. anyway, thats also an experience to learn from. so far so good. sometimes, u know, when i get really cranky and get the thing i call "bored sadness", the best tonic is to travel by the ptc(public transport corporation) bus-esp. the one that travels from my place to the library. it teaches me how fortunate i am to have a job and to have a job with a company which provides safe transport facilities for its employees. apart from that is the cool,secure working environment it provides and the decent food. and a lot more that i have to be thankful for. yet, there is always the nagging thot that i'm not even blessed to enjoy the money that i earn. i cant even visit the library leisurely, read a good book or develop a new hobby. am not even able to retain the existing hobbies! the one free day i get is a sunday and all i feel like doing on that day is eat and sleep. homemade food feels like a long-awaited blessing nowadays. lost touch with many friends. at the end of the day, after all the stressful work, i end up thinking,"is it really worth all the trouble?" probably, the past 4 to 5 generations have been brought up with the mentality,"work hard, earn, save for a rainy day" only recently have people started spending more money. the standard of living has improved but the quality of life has degraded. half of those who earn do not get the time to spend it(like me) and the other half do not spend it wisely. we are quickly losing our image as a richly cultured, civilized and decent society. God knows where all this is going to end!
hey,hey,hey,thus spake the old lady! see? i'm not even married and i've already grown old. anyway,whew! thats too serious a blog for a day. bro's engagement next weekend. so, will write later. enjoy! hakuna matata!:)

brother's engagement

hi,bloggie boy!g3 the devil's back with news and her views of the same. 1st things 1st, know wat, my brother's getting engaged!!!yup, he's chosen his soulmate,his partner for this lifetime. anu's a sweet gal, i'm sure they'll b happy together:)the engagement is on aug 22nd-pity i cant make it to both kannammai's and amirtha's wedding,both of which, i was counting on attending. anyway, thats life-full of surprises!well,lots of mails,phone calls,conversations around-its a once-in-a-lifetime occasion after all!with the One Above watching and taking care of everything, i know v neednt worry. so,thats the BIG news!:)hmm...not actually in the mood to blog. so, i guess some other time. bye,pal!

friends and life

hey,long time since i last thot aloud! hmm...lots to say yet nothing to say. today is friendship day. looking back, have a huge database of friends to be proud of but then, how many of them r the true intimate relationships that friendship is really meant to be? in most cases, maybe i have driven people away by being too possessive. in some, i've been the one to run away from commitment. in a lot of them, the intimacy isnt two-way. or maybe i expect too much. and things only seem to get worse. maybe the more i lose, the more i'm afraid to lose. well, chill...no point complicating life by thinking too much. the best consolation in most cases is "no man is worth ur tears and the one who is, wont make u cry". cute thot,huh?! :)

recently, a true friend and brother gave me some food for thought..."its better to be smart/buddhisaali than good(or wat do i call it?)/chamathu in some situations". been thinking about it-interesting and true. y else wud ppl change to being smart rather than remaining good which they r right from birth? well,grow up, gayatri, accept it. and try to be smart, not oversmart :) and i promised this friend-cum-anna that i wont cry. well, thats a goal to strive for. and i think i can do it. after all, i was the strong mature good gal at one point of time-wen was that? 3 years ago...well, not a problem. just have to get into that mindset again though the situation is now different. in fact, am probably at a better situation now. so, enjoy life,gays, u have nothing to lose now.
whew! thats a loooooonnng blog post. and still lotsa news to talk about-bro's engagement, my so-called trial of diplomacy, boss's hypocrisy and stuff. but rest in next. happy friendship day! hope a 'laughlady' thinks aloud next time rather than this crybaby :) hakuna matata!!:))

awesome and awful week

whew!what a whirlwind week!as erratic as the ekg of a heart patient!there was the stupid performance review, then the big fight about module change and then,appointment as "project engineer"(wow,gays,am proud of u:))hoping to perform well in the new module i've been deployed in.have to go to office 2morrow. will miss shopping with kans
:(( wish i cud go:(( anyway,2morrow also happens to be my tamil star b'day. hope i dont have a bad day at office. hope not,with shiva-san around. what a bold and straightforward guy!pity he is married :( ok,enuf for now.more later.take care and work smooth,o world!

aint this cool?!

hey,this feels good..u know,typing gyaan doogie howser m.d. ishtyle...hallo,world,this is gayatri's incorrigibly intelligent brain sharing its pearls of wisdom with u...take it if u want,it'll do u good someday..else,leave it? u rnt fortunate enuf-kuduthu vekkalai(thats a tamil phrase for those who came in late)god, y am i in such a bugged condition today? well,thats the way it is...hey,btw,am writing a poem,"now what". will post it wen i'm done. c ya...tc

simply sunday

hectic morn, attended yet another wedding of a colleague and wondered yet again how mine's gonna b. sitting at my comp rite now with my hair well-oiled and my brains buzzing with idle thots. attitude changes with time. they say,the course of events is determined by only 10% of what actually happens and 90% of how we react to it. but then, wat actually happens is what influences our thots and shapes our ideas. if nothing happened, v wud b dumb and blank,rite?! got the point? thinking abt it...wat say? chao,gtg and wash my hair..c ya

tada! here's my blog!

hi,guys and gals!
i really dont know wat a blog is. just sitting home idle on a fine sat and experimenting. tell me wat this is all abt pls. meanwhile, if u have the time and patience, u can always check out my blog to read my mostly stupid and sometimes precious thots
luv ya all! b there for me coz i promise i'll b there for u wen u need.
g3 the devil